A Little Secret About Being Financially Free

I'm going to let you in on a secret about getting your money together.

Sometimes it feels HARD. And that's okay.

I know, I know I'm supposed to be the Positive Patty who brings you tips + tricks to implement in your life with money. And trust me, I am. But I also need to be real with you. And the real truth is, you're not always going to feel like a badass money millennial. Sometimes you just want to throw in the towel and say, 'fuck it.'

And you know what? It is okay to feel that way. In fact, part of what makes you a magical human being are those moments of uncertainty. But what you need to hold onto in those moments is knowing that things are going to work out. Your income is going to come and go and if you goof up a little on your budget, learn from that goof and try again the next paycheck. What matters most is that you care about your finances and what they can do for you.

Secret bottom line? Sometimes trying to get your money shit together is HARD. But that's not a sign to stop doing what you're doing. And it's definitely not a sign to give up.

I believe in being transparent with you, and with that I want to share a snip-it into my always-stressing-about-money-and-freaking-out-constantly phase. I used analyze and obsessed over my budget every single paycheck so bad that it was near driving me insane. I would sit in my car and cry because it was payday and I didn’t have any money left from my paycheck to buy groceries. I even bounced a check that was meant to pay my rent that spiraled my checking account into the negative that incurred daily fees. It got to the point where I stopped looking at my bank account because it made me so damn depressed.

These were hard times. These were the times that shaped me to become a master of survival mode. And eventually (thank goodness) I got fed up with being stressed out 24/7. The only thing that money stress brings you is a downward spiral of more stress and more stress. (Are you stressed out about talking about stress too now?)

I want you to know this because, I get it. I know the struggle, I know that it’s hard. But from one millennial who has struggled to another struggling now, YOU. CAN. DO. THIS. You can get to where you want to be financially, you just need to RELAX. Right now, take a moment to close your eyes and take a deep breath. Start low in your belly and slowly fill your lungs with air all the way to the top, and then slowly release it back out. With each release of air, feel your stresses leaving you. Bring in thoughts of positivity and relaxation with every new inhalation. Do this as many times as you need in order to feel a little calmer.

Now that you feel more serene, I want to share some tactics with you. No matter where you are or want to be financially, these will benefit you. Keep these tactics in your mind if you’re feeling overwhelmed, stressed out, or just a little off track.

If you feel like your money is constantly disappearing and you stress about never having any, try surrounding yourself with it.

And by that I mean, keep money around you frequently. (No, you don’t need to hire someone to make it rain over you daily.) Put a couple dollars in the glove box of your car. Put a $5 bill in your nightstand, always keep a $10 in your wallet. Surrounding yourself by money (even if it's small amounts) helps to change your mindset about money continually being readily available. Conquer your mindset, conquer your stress.

Constantly keep yourself motivated.

If there is something you're trying to save money towards, give yourself reminders. Whether you want to take a trip or start making sizeable payments on your student loans. Make your screen saver that beach you're saving to relax on or put a picture on your fridge of what you would do with all the money you save after paying off your loans.

Take deep breaths to calm yourself down when you feel that stressing overwhelm coming over you.

Focus on your breaths in and breaths out, similar to what I had you do before going over these tips.

Find an accountability partner.

If you have a friend who you know is working towards some financial goal, buddy up with them for encouragement. If you’re more private, confide in someone you trust like a close family member. Lastly, if you don’t want to confide in someone you know, consider hiring a coach to help you grow and stay accountable. The important part is having someone you can bounce off of if you need some extra oomph to get through the day or you feel stuck with nowhere to go. This person is going to be your lifeline at those times.

Check your bank account frequently.

The thought of this still brings back those shivers for me. But in all honesty, knowing what’s in your account can actually save you money. By doing this, you know exactly where you stand (good or bad) and it helps you to not associate your bank account as being a bad thing. Again, it’s all about mindset. Don’t let your bank account be the bad guy, let it be the vessel assists you in getting things paid on time and a receptacle for your paychecks to go into.  


Most importantly- don't stop working towards your goal of financial freedom. I want to say this again in case it didn’t sink in- don't stop working towards your goal of financial freedom. Never give up on creating a better life for yourself. You're doing this, you're creating something important, and obstacles are a good sign. You just have to let those obstacles help you grow instead of tearing you down.

Samantha Durkee

P.O. Box 48, Boyne Falls, MI 49713